When we have been hurt, in the past, sometimes it takes several passes to heal the wound, to heal ourselves, and find a place of trust again. As we experienced in last week's workshop, Stepping Out of Self-Sabotage, honesty is our best friend in this process, a release of sweetness, even amongst the pain, a release that lets more of us shine again.

Peeling
2014 Piper Lauri Salogga

When I feel
the pain
on my left side:
my hip,
my back,
tissue, bone and tendon,
aching,
stabbing,
poking
reminder,

attempts at protection…

When my body’s voice
speaks to me
in this way,
I prefer to
ignore it,
make it go far,
far away.

But the body
knows
what it needs,
even as I am displeased
by the whining
persistence. Yes,
the body
knows
what it needs.

I have peeled
back
many layers
here
for over twenty
and two years,
since
the last time
it happened,
the last time
I said “NO!”
and it was done
anyway.

I have peeled
back
the layers,
not just mine,
also
generations
in my line;
it has not been
just me
amongst the feminine
in my family

held to the sheets.
Regrettably,
there are
many –
and they
cannot
be ignored.

Knowing
what I know…

the energy…

I have to
take it
upon myself,
use my voice,
tearing, tyrannical,
tender release,
for those
who could not
before.

I have to
use my
wanting heart
to call
at the truth –
the truth that
fear stopped.

We are in this
together,
you see?
All of us,
women
and men,
all of us are
in this
together,
healing.

The times
felt and felled
victim,
screamed and cried
and hit
the pillows
at night,
and then
early morning,
before the face
of the day began…

The times
curled up so
small, hiding
to never be seen
like that
again

I have pushed
myself back out…

had to, to live…

pushed
all of my
full-figured,
big-hearted,
wanting-to-trust
self, back out
into the life that
once
scathed me –

older, overbearing,
something–to-prove,
so weak, yet
angry body,
hands
forcing.

I will not let
them
of past,
keep me,
from the glory that is
mine,
ours,
the beauty that is
Life,

the stars,
grand Universe,
sanctuary sublime,
celebration,
Divine.

I am a stand
today,
everyday,
when the aching
remembers,
the moist
truth departing
my face…

another peeling…

I let myself
be
with the old
still in me
until
it is done,
gone back
to sleep,

or better,
dissolved in sweet
love
of mine,

drifted
away
with the winds,
scattered
to the upright
mountains,
high,

where the past
is held
and healed
for all
generations.